Fluidity

Yes, fluidity is dependent upon its relation to the present. But as with certain friends, who are like good books with many pages, we should take breaks away from them, put them down occasionally with a good bookmark in place. Pause is pressed. The present moment no longer continues in our minds while we are away from each other. There is no dwelling upon or stewing over done. No grudge burning holes nor puzzles requiring time to find solutions. The present moment has been forgotten but is not lost, because you used your bookmark. And so when it becomes time to return to the story of knowing your friend further, after the period spent apart, it is like an unpausing of the present. Reopening at the page where you left them, removing the bookmark, finding the precise line and continuing. A seamless sewing of presents despite them both occurring in different ages.  And so an act of fluidity does not need to be present all of the time, it just needs to feel like it hasn't spent time away from the present. Suspended animation.

Fluidity in the sense we're talking about here would then be the feeling of the absence of interruption. You could be being interrupted all the time. It's whether you subjectively feel that have you been interrupted or not which is important. A friend with epilepsy would stare blankly for minutes before returning to the present knowing nothing of this interruption.

This is not about the universal present. I'm talking about the subjective present. I'm talking about fluidity in the context of the shared subjective present of two people whose shared reality is suspended in time when they are apart, and continues as it had been whenever they meet again. 

As opposed to the two friends who continue living the present moment of the imagined other through their imagined selves in this present with the imagined other the very moment the two are separated. They cannot forget about each other. They must continue remaining in some sort of present, even if it must be fabricated by themselves. This is a relationship devoid of all fluidity and flow.

I Love It When People Use Facebook To Be Truly Honest About The Way They Feel

I love it when people use facebook to post things that are meaningful and don't try to project anything other the truth about what is happening for them. It takes courage to be open enough to do this, and being open is an act of making oneself vulnerable. Accepting one's vulnerabilities I think is the ultimate sign of strength.

When you open yourself up you are able to feel more. You become more receptive to your own emotions and also more sensitive to the feelings and emotions of others. Openness leads to vulnerability because we never know exactly what we will be letting in, and recognising each other's vulnerabilities is what allows empathy to grow - something the world desperately needs an injection of right now.

When you open yourself up on social media, not knowing whether anyone even cares to hear about the struggles you've been going through, you're sending out a beacon to all those people in a similar predicament that don't feel able enough to speak out about their own.

Seeing a friend take that leap of faith, being honest publicly about what life has actually been like for them, without the polished veneer, resonates people deeply and calls out to their soul (like a Batman signal in Gotham's night sky :D). It makes anyone receiving their message feel more human and reassured that they are not alone; and in the long run helps reconnect us all to one another the more people act in this way.

So, up with openness and vulnerability, because nothing can ever enter a doorway which is closed to the world.

We're already living in a Black Mirror reality - How Facebook is polticising friendship itself

I've just logged into facebook. Facebook greeted me, as it normally does. There was a small note at the top of my feed from - 'The Facebook privacy team'. For some reason I thought I would actually bother to read it this time. It felt a little bit like I was the cashier in the supermarket who had been asked how they were and in a protested by not sticking to the script by saying "Fine, thank you".

>You control who can like and comment on your posts
Ben, it looks like someone recently liked your post. We want you to know how to control who can like and comment on your posts

Initially I thought, cool. More control. I don't want any perverts look at my stuff and exciting themselves over it. Shortly after this moment of empowerment had passed, I considered a scenario in which I am in a pub with friends and I want to shout over that I like my friends new style. I open my mouth but find that nothing is coming out because my friend with the new hairstyle has forbid me to express any fondness for it. They now look over to me and we make eye contact. We both know that I've been muted in this social setting. I feel really frustrated and obviously no longer wish to express how much I like my so-called friend's hair. I suddenly feel ostracized by the whole group, perhaps I'm just over reacting? But I do have a horrible deep pang of paranoid fear that even more of the  people I'm presently sat with, that are joking and flashing smiles at me could have actually censored my ability to like their things. find myself sat there in uncomfortable silence, feeling increasingly emasculated as the party vibe din of the pub continues unabated by my realisation,

A new facebook saga in the making


Facebook again creates and hands us a another power which is essentially destabilizing in its nature, and as users are bestowed with this new level of "control", it helps alleviate facebook of blame for any of the dynamic corollaries that subsequently take place.

On the surface it looks like a courteous little reminder of what facebook features are available to you, but it's banal placement and servile language help mask the reality that facebook is gradually becoming a highly politicised space, and they are now moving into the business of politicising friendship itself.